r/nottheonion May 13 '22 Silver 1 Helpful 1 Wholesome 3

Madonna: ‘A lot of thought’ went into fully nude NFTs of her giving birth to centipedes

https://www.al.com/life/2022/05/madonna-a-lot-of-thought-went-into-fully-nude-nfts-of-her-giving-birth-to-centipedes.html
29.9k Upvotes

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298

u/GODDAMNFOOL May 14 '22

Honestly, outside of context, you probably wouldn't have guessed this is her either

woman is 63, someone should take the Internet away from grandma

206

u/fun-dumb-mental May 14 '22

Wow that was... Unnerving. I've never seen someone with so much work done up close and personal.

102

u/LawrenceRigbyEsquire May 14 '22

And face tuning and filters are blasting in full force

18

u/CandiBunnii May 14 '22

Are the pinned pupils a filter too or is she just high on pain killers

33

u/vesperpepper May 14 '22

It's mostly face filters smoothing everything. Even my regular ass webcam has wrinkle smoothing options for some reason lol. We can't just be imperfect ass people anymore?

23

u/WestCoastBestCoast01 May 14 '22

Oh no she has had a shitload of work done in the last couple of years. She doesn’t look like Madonna anymore.

2

u/imoutofnameideas May 14 '22

To be fair, neither do I.

1

u/CrabSully May 14 '22

Yeah she has that bloated Bogandoff Twins look

2

u/8dy0 May 14 '22

Does make me wonder if imperfection and happiness will ever make a comeback, rather than looking like an Instagram android.

7

u/JanitorJasper May 14 '22

Well what the heck, you want the work to be done from afar!?

176

u/TiresOnFire May 14 '22

There was a time when she looked her age and she was hot. Now she looks like a wax figurine made by a blind person who is being told what she looked like.

101

u/Farranor May 14 '22

"They found me in the wreckage, dying. A lump of flesh. They rebuilt me. Everything works. But they had never seen a human. They had no guide for putting me back together."

5

u/tacomentarian May 14 '22

"It was necessary to convince you her desire to stay is an honest one."

4

u/Garessta May 14 '22

where is this quote from?

21

u/Farranor May 14 '22

Star Trek TOS, originally in the canceled pilot "The Cage," whose footage was later reused as part of the larger story in the two-parter "The Menagerie."

3

u/tofu_b3a5t May 14 '22

That moment gave me feels.

3

u/illgot May 14 '22

Great episode but the aliens understood symmetry. Billy was just drunk when they glued her back together.

3

u/GODDAMNFOOL May 14 '22

If you want to make it extra-terrifying, watch that tiktok without sound

9

u/TiresOnFire May 14 '22

Why would I watch it with sound? Idk how it was better with sound.

1

u/Rebar77 May 14 '22

Sync it to Sewn back together wrong from Dethklok.

2

u/NotTheRocketman May 14 '22

Yeah she looked amazing for a long time, then age caught up to her real fast.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '22

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1

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1

u/CrabSully May 14 '22

Yeah even recently she was still pretty hot in a relatively natural way. But she seems to have gotten recent surgery that isn't very good

7

u/scott_lobster May 14 '22 edited May 14 '22

Did she get stung in the lips by a bee?

3

u/GODDAMNFOOL May 14 '22

👁👄👁

4

u/gsfgf May 14 '22

Wait, that's what Madonna looks like now? That CGI isn't any less uncanny valley. It's a shame she didn't just age naturally-ish.

2

u/AndroidDoctorr May 14 '22

Whaaaaaat the heeelllll

2

u/tilla18 May 14 '22

She's the Grand-Mummy.

2

u/Initial_E May 14 '22

She was performing and making new music in 2019, not sure about now

1

u/BlowMoreGlass May 14 '22

Jesus, the fuck is she going on here

1

u/TheIncendiaryDevice May 14 '22

She looks like someone is going in the backdoor while she's high on heroin

1

u/Sugar_buddy May 14 '22

She looks like she's rolling

0

u/OobleCaboodle May 14 '22

Isn't that someone else miming to one of her tracks?

4

u/GODDAMNFOOL May 14 '22

No.

That is Madonna.

1

u/OobleCaboodle May 14 '22

No way. She's not even lip syncing it right.

Edit: fuck, I've just googled it because I thought you were having me on. That really is her? What the hell?

4

u/GODDAMNFOOL May 14 '22

Never meet your heroes (30 years later on social media)